My ears are filled with yet more promises and a few questions come to mind.
- Do I take the time to even listen?
- Do I even care to listen IF I do take the time?
- Do I get my hopes up again only to have them thrown into the dirt once again?
- How many times will I hear the words I will show you?
- How many times will I fall for it and believe?
The answer is until the day one of us dies. That's how much I love you.
Tell me.
- Do you have someone: a lover, a boy/girl friend, a BFF, a child or someone else that you are so forever tied to that you will always be there when they cry help?
- If so, how do you deal with that constant roller coaster?
- If not how did you get away from it?
Tell me...give me, something, anything. I am banging my head on this up and
down roller coaster in my life that I want to get off of but don't have the key to.
Because folks I tell you that I am really tired of being this person. (Especially when it's not even my shit!)
It's really hard to be the person someone relies on most, especially when they are one of those roller-coaster people. I have gone through plenty of this and it doesn't get easier. In my experience, you can either keep going or extract yourself from the relationship. Either way, you must be firm and not let the person take advantage of you again. "I love you and I want to be there for you, but it is really taking a toll on ME as well as you. I can only keep being there for you IF ______" It is not easy, and it is not fun, but hopefully this person is worth it. =)
ReplyDeleteLibby Lou,
ReplyDeleteWhat an insightful statement you have made. I actually have done this more than once with other people in my life and it's caused several relationship deaths. Some have been peaceful, some have been sad and others well we will just leave that one alone.
Just this is one of those times when this is such a close family member that I needed a kick in the rear to get my gumption back and just do what I know is right.
It does give me hope to see that you have such a straight look on things at such a young age. Keep going young lady! You're awesome!
Going over to look more at your blog now.
Jonesie~~
Yes, and it sucks! There, I said it. When people you're close to count on you most and it affects your sleep, eating habits, and overall quality of life, something has to change. It is not easy, but absolutely necessary. No one person should have that much control over another life. We give them that power and the only way to get it back is to stand up for ourselves. No one is going to do it for us. You must be your own Champion!!! I know you can do it! (BTW, I'll need the pep talk soon, so you can just copy and paste if you like) Hope everything goes okay for you! : ) I've missed you, btw.
ReplyDelete