You see as many of you may know we are a very uniquely blended family of sorts. There is 10 years difference between myself and hubs with both of us having been married previously and with children. (He with 2 and myself with 4.) His two were grown (at least 18 yrs) when we first got together and mine were all under the age of 11.
Through the years we have had what I would call a roller coaster ride of emotions, actions etc. I've never quite been able to figure it out or even get a semblance of a grip on things until this past weekend and even then I didn't know quite what it was until I did a bit of digging on Google. Apparently, there is something called the Seven Stages of Development for Stepfamilies or The Step Family Cycle.
Now of course while all this "development" was happening it probably wasn't a good idea to mention this physco babble bullshit to me because I would have probably ripped your head off at any given time. (Maybe that is why God didn't reveal it to me until now? Geeezz! Does he always have to be right??)
Anyways, to get on with my story. Way back in the beginning of our relationship I had this idea that I would approach Chuck's two girls and explain that in no form did I want nor would I try to be in the mother role. What the HELL was I thinking? They were still trying to process the
I now know that this is referred to as stage one.
- Their mother never knit for them. Won't they be thrilled with what I can offer. I can be honest I NEVER felt or even thought ANYTHING remote to this.
- I love my new wife, so I'll certainly love her children. I don't know if Chuck felt this but I know that I certainly thought this regarding his kids.
- I'm glad to have a new father for my children. This one is interesting. I am sure it went through my head at some point but I don't think I allowed it to linger because I wasn't really looking for long term anything.